When I used to hear the word depression before my 20’s, I thought of a prolonged deep sadness that eventually you just won’t have anymore. No one tells you how much it can really ruin your life. It’s this voice inside your head telling you that you are unworthy, you are wasting your life, no one likes you, and that you are a complete waste of air. But, the absolute worst part of it, is that you one hundred percent think it’s true. It makes you believe that you are supposed to be alone so you push everyone away because of course, their going to leave anyway right?
But then your alone, and there’s no one to pull you back from the edge. Depression will keep telling you, what your doing and what your saying makes complete sense. Okay, sure you have your good days but then you have bad days and the depression can make the good days not that great and the bad days seem like an eternity. No one tells you that your appetite is going to be all over the place. You might eat everything in sight mindlessly or you may lay in bed all day and realize it’s 5:30p.m. and you’ve had a piece of gum.
Depression can make you miss out on life and unfortunately it’s because life can make us fall into depression. Something I heard recently from a good friend is that depression and anxiety can cloud your way of life and that when we start to live a life free of mental illness we can have mental clarity again and we can decide what we want in life.
There’s a reason depression and anxiety are called mental illness. You are sick. Kinda heavy, but it’s true. And there’s no shame in that. Sometimes it’s better just to say alright, I have depression…now what? The best thing you can do is realize it and admit it to yourself. If you walked around with the flu and kept getting sick, nearly fainting from a fever, and sneezing all over the place, the healthiest thing you can do is admit your sick and go get better. Look up remedies, see a doctor, ask for help, and rest. Mental illness works the same way. Find ways to make yourself feel better, get some exercise, create a small morning routine(this has helped me)or see a doctor for medication. You are never stuck in misery and there’s always a way out.
Feel better, Laura.