Writing is my life boat. In a world of depression and severe anxiety, working in a job I know I could never be extroverted enough for. Sometimes it feels like drowning. Waking up every day knowing I am not doing something that makes me happy. Writing, it breaks this cycle and gives me the space […]
She gets me…
I feel both invisible and on display. I’m always somewhere between, someone notice me, notice that I’m not okay. And, please don’t look at me, don’t see me. There’s nothing you can do. Just let me be.
Anxiety to the outside means racing thoughts. Their not racing, their forcing themselves into my head, maybe me think I’m going crazy. No, no, running my hands over my face and through my hair, I’m not crazy, I’m not crazy. It’s an attack. It’ll pass. I look back at the mirror barely noticing I’m there […]
“How are you doing?” “How are you feeling these days?” Burning questions that leave a hole making me feel like there’s two sides of me. The “How are you?” and the “So…how are you, how ya feeling?” Your asking me how I am and how my anxiety is doing. Believe it or not I’m not […]
A panic attack is one of those things where you know in the back of your mind there’s light at the end, but it doesn’t make the tunnel any less dark.
Dear Fellow Goal Setters, I live my life where I deprive myself of good things like good food, cute shoes, or a cute top because I constantly feel like I need to earn it. Therefore, I don’t deserve it unless I’ve done these stressful tasks. Lost weight, worked on my blog enough, or just got […]
When everything’s so loud that I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t think, I’m crying so hard that I can’t see. You have no idea how it feels to have anxiety. Racing thoughts, impending doom please someone help me…help me I can’t leave this room. It’s choking and it’s tight, smothering me. I can’t […]
Hi Everyone! So okay, here we go. Another blog I am pretty nervous to post. Takes big breath…and publish! I am sick of who I am. I have been very depressed, dysfunctional, anxious, unmotivated, and honestly incredibly unhappy for a while. Great, I’m unhappy. Now what. I have tried to lose weight in the past […]
My Dad last week. “When you were a little girl, you were so dainty and frail and sensitive, I thought the world was going to eat you alive and in a way I was right.” Yeah, we’re not close as you can imagine but that’s another day and another blog post. When there isn’t enough […]